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[pocketspa]

WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, TAAKO. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 420.87.169.02 *** coolertwin has joined 420.87.169.02 <coolertwin> wait <coolertwin> waaaaait <coolertwin> waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaait <coolertwin> made ya look lol

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anon usernames: < arcanistic >

Comments

[peccatore]

[Jesus, okay. Here goes.]

You heard me in there
Didn't you?
You heard me say I'm sick.
And that I keep hurting people because of it.

[On one hand, he's already admitted something along these lines to Lup, and generally speaking, what he trusts Lup to know, he trusts Taako to know as well. On the other hand, he could never shake the impression that Lup didn't really get what he was talking about. But the circumstances here are different - he started to lose it before the weight even got to him, collapsed while pleading with people who weren't there. He was practically forced to admit it.]

[pocketspa]

yeah
i did
but i dont know what happened that made you so hung up on it
i mean like brains right its just all kinds of stuff
dont wanna step on your moment though

[Ooof, he is. Not good at these conversations. He's just gonna hope this is moving in the vague direction of helping and keep at that.]

[peccatore]

I've done a lot of things


I'm sorry.
This is silly, isn't it?
If I hadn't said anything, you really wouldn't have brought it up either way.

[Yeah, this is going great.]

[pocketspa]

look
im certainly not the guy whos gonna be busting down your door and forcing you to tell me shit
but
this seems like it means something to you
the whole like
process of it
so say it if you really want to but dont think you have to drag yourself over the coals of shit because you feel like we can never speak again if you dont or w/e
you dont need to apologize for everything you are all the time
kay?

[peccatore]

Sorry.

I mean
I didn't really go into this talk with a plan.
And that's what that apology just now was for, not
what you said.

I think what I was trying to say is...
I'm better now, I've been trying to do better for a while.
But not that long ago, I was at a point where I deeply, fervently believed things that weren't true at all.
And what's worse, I tried to convince other people that I was right, too.
Like Fiddleford. Or even Elias.
I deceived people without knowing it
and I hurt people and I SHOULD have known it.

[pocketspa]

kay i mean
sure?
i mean unless youre a mind reader or whatever idk how you couldve predicted the future
sounds like you got played
im sure as hell not the guy to go off on you about innocent lives

[peccatore]

Wait
Played?
No,

No I'm not sure what you mean by that but
This was all me.

[He's also... kind of concerned by what Taako's implying at the end there, but this may not be the time.]

[pocketspa]

[Yeeeeeah, don't worry about that. Just. Shhhh.]

so you made a bad call
like. look
you did some shit
youre trying not to do that shit anymore
what else can you do

[peccatore]

[That's a bit of a loaded question, because what he WANTS to do is make up for it - but Making Up For It has been his motive for a lot of the worse things he's done.]

Nothing
I guess.

[pocketspa]

then there you go
and look its like
thats a choice right
people could decide to just be a dick about it
there are sooooo many assholes out there that just decide theyre gonna keep bein them and not give a shit and like
as one of those assholes i respect it on a circumstantial basis
but youre choosing to
that action means something
most people dont choose to be kind

[peccatore]

[...]

You really think so?

[pocketspa]

you are making me get way too sappy on main buddy
just take the words theyre there
and dont go praising to anyone i said anything nice to you ive got a reputation to uphold

[peccatore]

Wait, no.

I mean

Thank you for that, sincerely.
But
Do you really think most people don't choose to be kind?

[pocketspa]

why the hell would they
kindness doesnt benefit you
it never does
dont try to preach to me about people being good because you are not gonna get far

[peccatore]

No, don't worry.
I'm sure there's no point in arguing about it.

[He will, however, worry. Who hurt you, Taako...?]

[pocketspa]

[oh man, who hasn't hurt him, at this point.]

yeah not like a crazy amount
dont worry about it alright
i mean you worry about everything but seriously dont worry about it or at least dont do it to me

[peccatore]

[... Well, he won't MENTION it. He'll definitely still worry, though.]

Sorry about this.
The talk, I mean.

[pocketspa]

[Shhhhshs, no worries, just adore him without actually caring, it's fiiiine.]

eh
be sorry if you want
at least it probably helped your little anxiety circus over there right
stopped your fantasy tightrope people from falling off your heartstrings or whatever
idk do you want the circus to run better or worse bc i dont know whats better
i just know people keep throwing fuckin fire because some idiot decided that was family friendly
you feel

[No, Taako, he probably doesn't, because this is incomprehensible.]

[peccatore]

What.

[Well, if the plan was to get Marco to stop thinking about Taako's troubles, he got it in one.]

[pocketspa]

[(travis mcelroy voice) THE PRESTIGE!!!!]

dont worry about it
just think about fire jugglers in your head every time you feel burned out
wow that joke was almost too bad i hope that caused you more psychic damage than the kickback
anyway
see ya round go take a nap or something