[There was just no amount of preparation possible for Lup to get through this conversation. Every single bit of it hits her, hard, twisting around in her gut and making her feel sick. Her idea for the creation of the relics. Hiding the items out among the innocent people of this new plane they'd landed on. Her relic's absolute destruction, leveling whole towns (plural, she notes) in a burst of devastating flame. Her abrupt disappearance, noted only in a two word note left behind in her place.
It was just so much worse than Lup could have predicted. By the end of it, she almost wishes she'd taken Taako up on delaying the conversation till later, but there's no way that any amount of waiting could have made any of this better.]
T-Taako. [Is this all her fault? This seemingly vast distance between them, was it because of her choices? Did Lup keep running ahead, stubbornly charging forward when her brother wasn't ready for these difficult decisions, leaving him behind without even realizing it? Had she even had a discussion about becoming a lich with him or had it already been long decided before she told him?
(The answer, she already knows without asking, is no. Lup would like to think better of herself, but she knows exactly how she gets when she's focused. She's always barreling ahead, single-mindedly towards the finish. It was probably the same exact discussion with Barry, the only difference being that he'd agreed to change with her. With Lup, he had to know, sometimes you had to throw yourself into things or risk being left behind.)
The worst part is that, even if she hasn't lived through this future, Lup can see exactly why she did what she did. She can justify her decisions, her abrupt disappearance. She hates that it makes sense to her, this thing that ripped her apart from her brother and left him behind for ten years without her. Left with with nothing but the pain she'd unintentionally caused.]
Taako, I-I can't... [He isn't looking at her, but Lup can't take her gaze off of him, a hand reaching out to grab his arm. Tightly. They're both shaking now.] I can't take back what I haven't even done, but you know I fucking swear I'd never let anything or anyone get between us again. [An uncomfortable beat before Lup's voice lowers to a whisper,] Even me. Especially me. I... I really fucked up, bud.
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It was just so much worse than Lup could have predicted. By the end of it, she almost wishes she'd taken Taako up on delaying the conversation till later, but there's no way that any amount of waiting could have made any of this better.]
T-Taako. [Is this all her fault? This seemingly vast distance between them, was it because of her choices? Did Lup keep running ahead, stubbornly charging forward when her brother wasn't ready for these difficult decisions, leaving him behind without even realizing it? Had she even had a discussion about becoming a lich with him or had it already been long decided before she told him?
(The answer, she already knows without asking, is no. Lup would like to think better of herself, but she knows exactly how she gets when she's focused. She's always barreling ahead, single-mindedly towards the finish. It was probably the same exact discussion with Barry, the only difference being that he'd agreed to change with her. With Lup, he had to know, sometimes you had to throw yourself into things or risk being left behind.)
The worst part is that, even if she hasn't lived through this future, Lup can see exactly why she did what she did. She can justify her decisions, her abrupt disappearance. She hates that it makes sense to her, this thing that ripped her apart from her brother and left him behind for ten years without her. Left with with nothing but the pain she'd unintentionally caused.]
Taako, I-I can't... [He isn't looking at her, but Lup can't take her gaze off of him, a hand reaching out to grab his arm. Tightly. They're both shaking now.] I can't take back what I haven't even done, but you know I fucking swear I'd never let anything or anyone get between us again. [An uncomfortable beat before Lup's voice lowers to a whisper,] Even me. Especially me. I... I really fucked up, bud.